love is in the air ♥

Saying those stuff, makes me double sinful.

Im ready to go hell.

I cant wait to meet Mr Da Vin Ci.

The creator of homosexual, and hope he promotes me the director of homosexual. haha.

I can wait to meet the guard, DE SATAN.

jae is sick in her brains. sicko.

the kiss of imu at 8:09 PM .

i just heard one of my favourite song, bet this entry will take a long time.. where is she, where is she, where is this beautiful gal? who is she? who's gonna complete my world? YOUNG rocks.. he plays all my favourite songs..

i cannot get feeling back. cannot concentrate when all my favourite songs are playing, i also cant turn it off.. trying my best.. hahaha.. anyway i just made juliana angry..

sometimes i just don'te feel the family bonding anymore. holding my mom's hand seems foreign to me.. looking at my dad it disgust me.. looking at the house, it bores me.. hearing the same thing over and over again, it deafens my hearing system. not sometimes, but my house slowly has became my hotel. its only use for leisure times. i only bath, use my laptop, sleep, go toilet. most of my happy times been spent out of this boundary. i can never find the warmth and bla bla i used to get. i cant see it, i cant feel it, i cant touch it. am i slowly turning into some unfeeling ingrate? or slowly became some cold- hearted animal? what actually happened to this family? some man, wanted to woo mom again.. wats new? if the both of them divorce or not, my mom remarried or not. i will not call the next man, dad. i seldom call my dad, why should i bother to call another man? (im just saying wat if). i meant if such things happened, i rather ton outside. when u really need a stick, its either you don'te have or you got no excused to get away to smoke. i think thats all i thought or over-reacted.

supposed to write ytd, i got into Laselle. but have to sit for some el test. coz i got a 7. lets start from the beginning. let's skip the interview stuff. anyway the interviewer's name is derrick. and he's handsome, stylish, have a goatee.

we were waiting for for nur, the bims came, then feeza was interested in the heels she's wearing so feeza went ta asked: sorry, tat dae we wore a pair of yellow heels right? where did u get it from? she answered: from tommy hilfiger. feeza answered: oh.. when i went to the room, feeza burst out laughing... she sells shoe. and obviously she recognised her shoe. the bim bought it from her shop.. hahaha.. so the bim lied..moreover, tommy never sells heels right, tiff? omg.. went town to meet sha sha, was late.. it was her bdae, but all of us her broke.. haha.. so went to coffee bean and bought her a muffin.. she made a very touching wish.. she hope all of us will be her best fren forever.. :) thats sweet. had 2 muffins and a drink for 2.60.. haha.. thanks to feezha. her primary sch fren working there.. her cousin working at topshop. cool man to have her.. i can get discount everywhere.. hahaha..kept taking pics..
before going to esplanade, we went to the bus stop infront of heeren and waitin for bus 14 stupidly.. till gary saw bus 14 and wanted to stop the bus, but the bus ignored him. till we knew that there's no bus 14 over at that bus stop. let's make it fast, before smth wrong with my connection again.. took alot of pics.. i meant spastic ones.. haha.. with jae, who will not be spas?
read my only draft ytd.. felt like crying.. and read my old entries.. i think i have selectively lost of memory. i forgotten many things.. but some i couldnt.. oh ya going for new job interview tmr..

the kiss of imu at 5:40 AM .

where did i stop? oh so i stopped at the lady i have infatuaion on.. hehe.. okay her name is very special. her name is inch.. cool huh.. the next dae i was wrking with pb, cyrus and yang, auntie, uncle mike, and desmond.. cyrus and me started early.. and i was punctuated around 7 plus.. i felt totally numb.. have been running from event to restaurant.. many times.. basically exhausted.. i nearly poured champagn on the bride's fren. phew.. anyway i still poured evian on my guest.. and i felt so guility.. but there's me and marathir in the restaurant.. it gets so busy till like 2.30pm.. i had my fair share of fun.. we wanted to helped out after 10, but the superwoman, doesnt alllow.. she's working 8 in the morning.. and she doesnt want us to help.. barbie.. wanna fight with her.. but still defeated.. haha..
sunday was just a normal dae, went back to draw.. paint and bla bla..
mon, it was fun.. it was the mock interview.. still the same bunch.. me, feezha,nur,joyce,steffany,vincent were talking and laughing very loud.. went to get our clay work.. lucky, my didnt broke, joyce scrulture broke. so is bim.. and she used 1 full super glue to glue her lace. joyce make a big fuss about it.. they went gaga over my digi cam.. becoz its flat and have 5.1 mega pixels.. feezha, the joker of the class been making faces, joking, making everyone laugh.. ahhh, u know wat they passed my IC around, some of them couldnt recognise my face even.. they still say i bring my sis IC around.. ahhh..joke of the dae..after the mock interview, we went to town tgt, tmr's sha sha's bdae.. might be going to club, she never been to club.. so yup.. and geisha.. had so much fun with them.. went to kinokuniya to flip through design's books.. they say i should have better taste to have an infatuation on inch, nur thinks that she's very sloppy.. joyce and me don'te think so.. i hope the few of us can see each other again this july..

and im so sick of love songs so tired of tears..

the kiss of imu at 7:07 PM .

Dododododododooh oh yeah
Gotta change my answering machine now that I’m alone
cause right now it says that we can’t come to the phone
and I know it makes no sense
cause you walked out that door
but it’s the only way

I hear your voice anymore(It’s religion love)
it’s been months for some reason I just(Can’t get over us)
And I’m stronger than this(Enough is enough)
No more walking round with my head down
I’m so over being blues crying over you[chorus]
And I’m so sick of love songs so tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I’m so sick of love songsSo said and slow

So why can’t I turn off the radio
Gotta fix that calendar
I haveThat’s not July 15th
Because since there’s no more you
There’s no more anniversary
I’m so fed up with my thoughts of you
And your memory
Now every song reminds me of what used to be

[chorus]That’s the reason I’m so sick of love songs
so tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs
So said and slow
So why can’t I turn off the radio
Ohhhh(leave me alone)
leave me alone(stupid love songs)
don’t make me think about her smile(oooooh)
I haven’t my first shout
I’m letting go turning off the radio
I’m so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said I’m so sick of love songs
So said and slow
So why can’t I turn off the radio
(3x)Why can’t I turn off the radio

it just explains all.,at that part of time
but this part of time, i have lost everything.

the kiss of imu at 6:37 AM .

its getting more and more fun ovr at laselle, but very tiring. due to the travelling. haiz, i feel that my art isnt that good after all. but trying very hard to do my portfolio. having a headache now. so shant type much or in detail. i got an infactuation over this lady in my class.. before telling you why i got an infactuation over her. if im not wrong its the third dae. i came in to the printmaking room. and sat beside nur and gary. and started to crap and craving. she came, at down, after a while she came to our table. she's got an american accent. sounded very nice.
her: sorry, you gals have any tempons?
us: no.
i was confused. too concentrated.
me: yes.
passed it to her.
her: thanks.
i went back to my cravings.
she came beside me.
her: sorry, i forgotten, that i didnt wear my unties todae.
in my mind i was thinking. hmm this sounds appetising. haha..

the kiss of imu at 4:35 AM .

just reached home. let just do a quick update. todae was much an exciting dae. did linoleum painting. but still craving. know 4 ladies todae. all every corny and full of craps. haha.. met darren and manp. helped darren to get gift for lao po. got myself a jacket at LP. at least i wont. freeze to death in painting lesson. okay get back to my art piece. nitez ppl.

the kiss of imu at 6:17 AM .

lets update before turn in to bed. ytd was my first dae for the course. i was late, thanks to the train. it supposed to be fast.but it turn out that i was late for class. wow. alot of student indeed. got a few dolls too. and an andro. cool right. ytd did some sculpting with clay. its very basic though. i was sitting infront, so when the clay came, my lecturer intro us to all the tools on the table. and i became his demo. everyone laughed. wats new. we learnt 3 methods of moulding our clay. i used 2 methods and made an ash tray and a dog bowl for zero. wanted to make a cup for mom. but yea, didnt succeed so changed my idea to a bowl for zero. i put a partition, so one side can put water the other put her food. how convenient. angro did ash tray too. but i think her's look nicer. everyone have different idea. very idealistic. angro got many tattoos on her hands. how cool. and have blue and green hair.. oh jesus, the 3 dolls is damned annoying. they are such irritants ls. bla bla, giggle giggle.. kiling my brain cells. it was fun though.
todae we have a lecturer, taught us drawings. i drew still life. the others drew portraits. the dolls can draw real well. i don'te know is it much help from the lecturer. oh they are real good. i don'te know. although they sat infront of me. anyway i knew none of my classmates name. even the gal that show me to the classroom todae. i forgotten to ask her name. tmr i will ask her name. one the doll have ncie cleavage. heh im not being a pervert here. so is my lecturer. i tell u the situation. my lecturer overturn the table and drew the portrait with the tabel upside down. and she's wearing spag strips. she asked everyone to stand infront of her so that we can see wat she draw. and she keep bending forward. so can my point? and this doll, she keep standing and bending, somemore siting infront of me. u know, distractions. haha.
i currently very stress. just finished looking for design for tmr's linoleum paint. i still got 2 art work haven finished. 1 charcoal and the other car sketching. and my lecturer still can say its just a work shop, don'te get so stressed up. if u get stressed up, nothing will come into your mind. yup 100% right.
looking forward for april 6..
im still thinking abt retaking.

the kiss of imu at 6:53 AM .

I don'te want to pick u up.
Neither do i want to let u go.
I want to keep you by my side.
To let me know i still have you. (imaginary)

you will only appear in my dreams..

the kiss of imu at 3:56 AM .

finally my laptop is here. but yup i did smth very stupid. i try to bluetooth picture to my laptop. but couldnt. nvm, so i took ut my memory card and place in to the hole thats available. ass. now my memory card is stuck inside. and there's no eject button. i tried to use all sorts of tools that i can think of. but its still couldnt come out. how fuck up can it be. i just got my laptop and i did smth very stupid. please, anyone can help me!! hehe, i solve it anyway.. lucky my memory card didnt spoil. i saved myself.
have been slogging, but have no saving. been spending on something that i cant see. so darren and me decided to open another account, to save money for rainy dae. moreover he got lao po.

i intro my pb to vanilla pot, haven start work, she already feel very excited and starting to love this job. and she keep thanking yang and me. great that she love this job. and yup trying to flirt with yang.. it was so funny. and half the time yang couldnt pronounce pb name. xuan became xian.. hahaha. after the wedding solemnization, pb keep thanking all the guests. whcih was supposed to be done by yang.. so cute.. and yang like pb's working attitude. good. at least, when ayone of us not free, pb can take over our place. oh yup she pierced her tongue. cool. but 1 month plus already its still not healing. during break time, all of us plus yana, riduan sat down to eat.. yana and yang started to talk and they laughed like witches please. cyrus and me got shock. after pb left, my dear bud called me. i wonder how's she? never reply my message. i just seriously hope everything's gonna be fine, 1 year plus r/s, i don'te wish every trivial fight they have causes them to break up. i don'te wish jo to go depression too. moreover they are going on hols tgt. i just hope things will turn out well.

yang kept laughing at me the whole of ytd pls. and kept jacking me. after the clearing up, we were told to help out at the bar, and yang got so angry. becoz this is last min thing. no choice, so helped out. and this is wat we get. i don'te want to say in detail, it will just make me boil.

i was very fucked up with rafiz ytd. so was yang. i saw yang boiled up ytd. omg, that look very scary. her eyes opened so big, and said: cj, ARE YOU TIRED? YOU JUST SAY YOU ARE TIRED. I WILL JUST TELL RIDON, AND WE CAN GO HOME. so are u tired? she told the same to cyrus too. both of us got shock. but we still stay till 10 pm. i got fed up with my bar supervisor.

but after all the fucked up thing happened, we went to newton circus to have supper. went to find the 'bee hive' hair auntie.. and ordered no. of nice food. ordered 'chu chu' that yang find it so interesting and chutx and yang went chuting away, cause i hate the taste of it.

haha, do i walk very funnily?

the kiss of imu at 1:52 AM .

im addicted to this song 'waiting for you'. not much reason for this song.. don'te know why, myabe still missing the wrong person. anyway don'te talk abt the person. mayo became my best fren. haha.. not much to write, i scolded someone older than me by 8 yrs cried ytd. must be thinking i very bad? nope. just want her to wake up from something. shakina going to quit.. so sianz.. everything's turning sour.. oh ya my gf, miss jasnita came down.. anyway he's a guy. its just names. my gf , mayo and me were talking abt sex that dae and teaching each other new methods. and asking alot abt sensitive parts bla bla bla..
wat else, nothing already.. still thinking abt the wrong person..
oh yup videoed a very cute baby.. want to put it up.. but yea, jae's an blog idiot..
oh ya , darren have a lao po.. and the lao po's 2 daugh says im cute.. i felt honoured.. hehe..

waiting for you by Anson Hu yan bin.
am i waiting for someone?

the kiss of imu at 11:42 AM .

at darren's place now, ytd was his bdae, 6 of march.. its the 7th already, had clique outing, pon work.. becoz of miss tiffie.. yup i miss all of them.. before the clique outing lets talk abt the 5th.

i went over to joy's house thinking we'll be going to woodlands library, change of plans, went to visit jo, at outsider cafe.. he wore blazier and pants, smart looking, we brought his kitten along.. its damned cute but also damned noisy, kep meow meow meow.. irritating man, but its nice to feed them with milk and watch them sleeping.. very cute.. i videoed them.. took the kitten out to sort of surprise josie, she was crying over the phone the dae before, so went to check her out.. her cafe is ex man, me and joy spent like 23 plus there.. everyone is fed up with work.. darren called, went to watch big ma ma house 2, i would recomend that show, its hilarious, its touching, some part i meant. we brought the kitten in the cinema too, but we left it near the stairs so that it wont start its nonsense. so me and joy have to take time to have lookout. for once we were lock outside, thats funny.. went to joy's house to feed the 2 hungry kittens..

zero was home, sis went to JB for seafood, when can i sneak out to m/s again? haha.. maybe after my bdae..
tiff message this morning asking whether im free, only replied like 12 plus, ended up not working.. had pastamania with cyrus and tiffie, and later on priya joined. and we called jo.. went to heeren to take neos, haha we look retarted in the pics.. but its still nice.. went to cine, across the road we saw some guys wearing tighs with lots of money sign on, and we started laughing and laughing, coz i was teasing tiffie, coz they wore purple tights. went TCC for coffee, coz the priya needs her daily caffeine. went to watch big ma ma house 2 again. went to rocky master and met kane.. wanted to go balcony, instead forfeit, there's bouncer upstairs, though we're 18, i doubt anyone of us can go in except tiff.. took bus down to clarke quay, being a nuisiance in the bus creating havoc.. haha... making everyone laugh, ouch my face hurts, i have been slapped and pinched for being cute..haha.. got down, walk around clarke quay and found esky bar, went in.. wow its freezing~ had drinks over there its a cool place, it will be our next outing place i guess.. just tat the music sucks.. jo and priya left early.. waited for soo.. hahaha priya's fone died.. there's mist in her LCD, so its frozen to death.. its time priya to get a new fone.. went to have seafood mania, but the standard is not there, i rather go to coffe shop have all that.. went to the bar opp for another round of drink, they didnt check ic, coz they have no business.. after a while the music sux man.. went to tpy to meet darren and mayo, feng, darren again.. played pool, was distured by this 2 gals after i sent feng to tpy's kfc to find monique.. 2 gals were talking and 1 were pointing and like talking to me, so i pull out the ear piece and i go like:sorry?. her fren was like: she's just disturbing u.. weird gals.. i saw this damned sexy and pretty gal over at the pool place.. wow, u don'te see pretty gals everydae.. audrey is pretty too, a very nice and smiley server..

thats all folks..
nothing much interesting..
im missing the wrong person...
guess it willl be gone after awhile..
told jo and cyrus..

the kiss of imu at 10:02 AM .

im having brain block now.. i have too many things to write.. many things happened.. i finally can decide wat to put for my hand, the 5 pointed stars which is known to be satanic. but not, in actual fact its quite holy. Read from Da Vin Ci code. lets just start from ytd. i came at 4, suppose to do floor, ended up go cashier coz not enough staff, then saw mayo very stress, have to pack coleslaw, do whip, cut lemon, cut spring onion. till around 5 plus, she damned stress, and started crying.. i took over her, then auntie fuck me upside down man.. when drinking after work, mayo came down. bought 2 bottles of baron, she wanted to get absolute vodka.. lucky she never get, if not this morning u will c the 2 of us sleeping there man.. 2 bottle we both drank till damned tipsy.. suck from straw some more, she keep slapping me.. darrena nd john were there too, but all gay la, don'te want drink. after that go tpy play pool, i ate noodles, after awhile went to toilet and vomit like mad.. mayo still can play pool man, then mayo also cannot take it lie on me, then i tell her that i got crush on her before, she started laughing and say really! i said: yup.. then she's so happy.. den shew gave me a kiss and stood up, i just fall asleep on darren's lap..
went to bishan to eat coz very hungry.. alot of funny things happened man, i only rmbed i keep got slaps by mayo, she's damned aggresive when she's drank.. coz i don'te let her ton alone outside coz everyone going home, so asked her to go my house. wa she damned freak,go into my room straight take off her pants.. nvm, then i pass her shorts, then she take off ehr clothes, nvm, then she take off her bra, half naked infront of me.. damned freak man, lucky i closed my eyes.. she was going thru my photos while i went to bath, then we tok crpped thru out till 3 plus, toking abt sex.. she keeep asking me, ` i help you do.. come ar, i help u do.. she slept on my bed, they always like to sleep on my bed man.. she ask me wanna sleep tgt.. then i say cannot, i will kick u down the bed..
last sun, me and fish went to vanilla pot to work, from 8 to 1 am.. they keep putting me in charge man.. its a small wedding.. with breakfast only.. somethings happened, fz and yang fought becoz of us.. yang is our station in charge.. after 12 we went up with desmond to rest int he room, yang clear the sofa for the king, desmond to sleep.. coz he kicked midnight soccer.. then me and fish keep talkin to her abt our sch life and her working life with all the shits she got.. she was amused by wat we did... and keep laughing laughing..her laughter is very contagious.. i pon chicken work.. coz of spiderman, i hate to work with him.. go out with fish and yang to compass, yang still think i love miss 10, nahx, in order to keep this friendship i don'te want to. too tired to go for another r/s.. can say im happily single.. don'te wish to look for gf, maybe this whole yr.. knowing the gal i like wont accpet me at all, no point trying so hard again.. single might be a good thing for me.. oh talking abt this, mayo say having sex more often will help us in bonding.. i think its true. but..
yang say if im a guy, i will be a very nice guy.. and she talked abt the 3 of us, she find us very unique.. 3 of us doesnt look the same.. diff style.. but a nice bunch..

thanks miss #02 for listening to my craps last night.
study hard.
take care of yourself.

photo by ryan caberra

A photo can say a thousand things
But it can't say the million things
I wanna say
A photo can capture the way we were
But it can't capture the way we are
'Cause you're far away

What it's like to know you
What it's like to touch you
When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me
you don't need me and
I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one dayYou and me will have one more shot

Timing lost minutes and moments
And I might be lonely gir
lBut I'm not afraid
In a second
It all comes right back to me
Nothing's forgotten now
Yeah everything's saved
What it's like to touch you
What it's like to know you
When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me you don't need me
and I know that hurts

'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have one more shot
You were my life
you were my faith
You gave me hope every day
When you told me that you loved me
were those just words
You can't tell me
you don't need me
and I know that hurts
'Cause I'm looking at your picture
'Cause it's all I've got
Maybe one day
You and me will have one more shot

no other meaning for this songs, maybe i just don'te know how i felt, but just like this song.

the kiss of imu at 9:55 AM .